Wednesday, January 2, 2013

In Which the #Trainwrecks Make Resolutions

Or, our Dreams for 2013....we couldn't make up our minds.

1. Become more decisive.

2. Leave our individual houses more, and not just to go to the other's house. That's cheating.

3. Broaden our social talking points. Not everyone needs to hear every Doctor Who companion recited to them in order...at least not in the first five minutes of meeting them at least.

4. Learn how to go to a bar. Things like "And then you send trolls to kick me while I'm down." shockingly do not go over well when shouted in a bar and no one remembers the historical reference from the WB show Charmed.

5. Tact. It'll probably come as a surprise to some (okay fine, none) of you that we don't seem to have much of this. It's just that those who don't know that the columns of the Ancient Greeks are not actually straight, but slightly bulge in the middle to appear as though they are straight while the columns of the Parthenon appear straight because they are (Thanks QI/Stephen Fry/Johnny Vegas) are morons and really just need to be told so. But that was the 2012 #trainwrecks, these new and more tactful #trainwrecks of 2013 will just pull a person aside and say that instead of screaming it in a bar.

6. Start an internet campaign to bring back the 'cancelled too soon' TNT drama formerly known as Leverage.  It did nothing to deserve being cancelled and there are many things I would like resolved as pointed out in my letter to the cast and crew last week.  I know that if we all band together we can bring this show back.

7. Drive to Texas during the off-shooting season to seduce and later marry Jensen Ackles and Christian Kane.

8. We should also probably work on crushing on men who are closer in age to us.

9. And not men that we may know more things about the fictional characters they've played on TV than things that are actually about them.

10. Oh just forget it, who needs resolutions anyways, we'll just work on keeping ourselves perfect.


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